Breathe!

I hear you. You feel upset. You feel mad. You feel angry.

(Notice that I didn't say "are" but "feel" because you are you and you are not a feeling, a thought or a state of being.)

That really set you off. It pushed your buttons. It hurt.

I have a tool. I'm not saying it will go away and I'm not saying you don't have a right to feel upset, but....take a deep breath.

A deep breath breath?

Yes, breathe. It will calm you down. It will help you to not do what you wouldn't want to do.

In this week's parsha Jacob, on his deathbed, imparted his last words and blessings to his sons.

Jacob turns to Shimon and Levy. He reproaches them, chastises their impulsive behavior, reprimands what they did with their anger. As Rashi points out, he doesn't curse them, but their wrath, their anger.

The word he uses for wrath is אַפָּם֙ (apam) related to the word for noise, אף (aph).

You know that a person breathes without thinking. It's automatic, but you can hold your breath, slow it down, or quicken it with intention. So too with anger. You feel it and you can react automatically with it, or you can control it; slow it down or wile it up.

Anger, breathe.

Automatic, or directed.

With my breath I can calm myself down or get myself excited.

I can take a deep breath through my nose, and slowly let it out. I can blow away my tension or I can allow flight and fright to take over and pump myself up.

You see there is so much in your breath.

Something automatic, but something that you can control and master, to get a hold of yourself, to calm yourself, let the tension blow away with will and with practice, bz