Inner Connections Burst: Av-The Month of Hearing

I went to the supermarket yesterday with my oldest daughter. We stepped out and it was boiling hot. Chatting with her I pushed our shopping cart along the sidewalk trying to get away from the entrance. There was a woman pushing a shopping cart two carts in front of me. Between us there was a cart without anyone. I reached ahead to push the ownerless cart out of the way just so that we could get by. The woman ahead turned and yelled at me. It was her cart as well.

First I hadn't known and second I wasn't pushing her or anybody, but that didn't matter. Regardless she had no right to yell.

I stopped because my ears at that moment heard a bunch of syllables but there was more to hear to understand the bigger picture.

I'll be honest with you. We are a family of seven b"H and I have yet to have two shopping carts of food. I simply can't afford to buy more than we need or want for the moment. But I put myself in her shoes. This woman who was trying to push two full carts in the boiling sun. I listened carefully.

I handed my daughter our cart and I took the other woman's cart and I said, "Where is your car? I have free hands. I can help you."

Her muscles softened and so did her voice.

"Thank you."

Amazing how when you listen well everything you hear is different.

I could give you a million examples like the scene above where I feel like I'm being attacked or I am attacking and it's just a matter of not hearing, not understanding what is going on.

We saw that last month, according to Sefer Yetzira that Tammuz correlated to the power of sight. This month, Av, correlates to the power of hearing.

Yes, we are talking powers here.

A power can be used to build or to destroy. To be a conduct for life or a conduct for death; for purity or for impurity.

Av is the month where we need to listen, to listen and hear the whole story in order to understand what is going on.

Rav Moshe Shapiro z'l brings a beautiful idea. When we hear, in order to understand, you can't just hear one syllable. Each syllable forms a letter which forms a word which forms a phrase or a sentence. There must be a link connecting each syllable. If you don't hear the entire story, you either misinterpret or don't understand.

So too a building is built one brick, one plank, one stone at a time, but each on their own isn't a building. You need to make a connection between each one in order to build.

When we talk about the chorban חורבן -destruction of the Beis haMikdash (Holy Temple) we are talking about the destruction of a "building". A building that was built with a lot of stones. There was a connection חיבור from this "building" between us and Hashem. There was more clarity, more understanding.

A person had a clearer picture of what was expected and what they needed to do. Clarity. It's so important, to understand right from wrong, what to do and what not to do.

It, the Beis haMikdash, was burned to the ground, but we don't speak of it as burned down. We speak about it as destroyed. When something is burned there is nothing left. When something is destroyed we see that there was something. Something was there, something is still there. We need to take the bricks and build once again.

So let's make the connection.

Let's try to understand to make more connections.

Let's try to hear better, with more compassion and understanding.

Do you understand what I am saying?

Look around you. Try to connect the dots, the syllables, try to open your ears and your hearts and truly hear.

May this month of Av, the month of destruction, be a month of redemption and building.

B'sorot tovot,

Elana