Inner Connections Menachem Av

"When the month of Av (which begins today) enters one should decrease in joy."

It's a lot to ask of us, no?

Turn on, turn off. Be more happy here and less happy there. How can we be asked to fine tune our emotions as though we were an instrument?

Wait a minute. What are the words here? "Decrease in Joy". It doesn't say don't feel joy. In fact no where in the Torah are we ever told not to feel joy, or what to feel. But we are given a tool of how to influence what we feel or at least the intensity of it.

Meaning...

What I do can affect my emotions.

What I say can affect the way that I feel.

"Basics" such as what I eat, what I wear, listening to music (hobbies), my appearance, the thoughts that I put into words-my speech will all affect my emotions, the way that I feel.

Even my actions (that's right, mine not necessarily theirs) can create feelings of love or hate even when nothing is there...

How I feel affects what I do and what I do affects how I feel. The emotions we don't always have control over, but the actions we do.

So ask yourself, "What am I feeling? Is this a productive way for me to feel? Is it a healthy way to feel?" (And mind you grieving, shock, sadness are all healthy emotions at the proper time for the proper duration.) If it's not, what can I do to help myself see this in a different light, feel this less intensely, bring more joy and satisfaction to my life?

May this be a month of menachem, of comfort and may our actions bring "joy" to Hashem, to ourselves, to those around us.

Chodesh tov,

Elana