The Answer

She keeps getting the message, but she doesn’t want to hear. Or maybe she can’t. At least not now. No, now she’s not open to receiving it.

She runs from one person to the next. One therapist to the next. One adviser, one healer. They all tell her pretty much the same thing or maybe what they tell her are lies? She runs to one more and then yet another. She has so many doubts. Searching for the one who will give her the “answer”. You know, the answer.

We see her run and we sigh a heavy sigh in sadness. It’s so sad that she can’t trust the message that she keeps getting.

Yes, we sigh at her running, or is it at her being stuck? Afraid of change, of committing. She keeps saying, “Doesn’t this need fixing?” But the problem isn’t that it’s broken or that he or she is bad, too challenging. The problem is actually in her accepting, maybe in letting go? Maybe in embracing? She keeps looking for a different answer then the one that they give. What in fact is she seeking?

"Send out for yourself men who will scout the Land of Canaan, which I am giving to the children of Israel. You shall send one man each for his father's tribe; each one shall be a chieftain in their midst (Bamidbar 13:2)."

Send for yourself: According to your own understanding. I am not commanding you, but if you wish, you may send. Since the Israelites had come [to Moses] and said, “Let us send men ahead of us,” as it says, “All of you approached me…” (Deut. 1:22), Moses took counsel with the Shechinah . He [God] said, “I told them that it is good, as it says, ‘I will bring you up from the affliction of Egypt…’ (Exod. 3:17). By their lives! Now I will give them the opportunity to err through the words of the spies, so that they will not inherit it.” - [Midrash Tanchuma 5]

Instead of running in quick stand that actually makes us stuck, maybe she needs to stop-stop struggling, stop resisting? Stop so that she can hear the messages being said and not only what she wants to hear. Perhaps then she’ll be open to seeing the blessing that is there.

Shabbat Shalom,

With blessings,

Elana