Say YES!
She’s overwhelmed and tired. She’s frustrated or is it resentful? She complains to me that she has no time. No time and no energy.
No time she tells me to take a nap. No time to read a book or exercise. She needs some time to herself. Some quiet.
Time alone she craves. But there’s none; she laments.
We look at her diet and she tells me she has no energy to eat healthy. No energy and no money.
She has no time to pray or to meditate. Forget about going to a class or doing anything social.
You see there’s a list here of, “I can’t. I don’t have the time or the energy or the money.”
Hmmm.
None at all? Is it really like that life? All or nothing?
And the Lord God commanded man, saying, "Of every tree of the garden you may freely eat. And the Lord God commanded man, saying, "Of every tree of the garden you may freely eat (Beresheit 2:16-17).
And the woman said to the serpent, "Of the fruit of the trees of the garden we may eat. But of the fruit of the tree that is in the midst of the garden, God said, "You shall not eat of it, and you shall not touch it, lest you die (ibid 3:2-3).'"
and you shall not touch it: She added to the command; therefore, she came to diminish it. That is what is stated (Prov. 30:6): “Do not add to His words.” - [from Sanh. 29a]-Rashi
It’s true. There isn’t time for everything and maybe there aren’t the resources available for everything, but don’t you see it’s not all or nothing.
That means if you need a nap, you really could find a way to take one.
You want to lock yourself in a room and read a book? Maybe an hour isn’t realistic, but who says you can’t read for fifteen minutes?
Instead of a full class at the gym, how about dancing in your kitchen or going for a brisk walk? A few minutes here and a few minutes there. Yes, it adds up and a little bit really is better than nothing at all.
No time to go to a class, but can’t you put one on while you’re cooking or cleaning?
You’re right, there’s no money to go out to dinner, but a coffee or an ice cream here and there you might be able to obtain. A new outfit isn’t in the budget, but how about an accessory?
Forget about juicing and sprouting, but a hard-boiled egg with some vegetables is doable. Treat yourself to a piece of good dark chocolate and cut out the cake. You're on your way to eating healthy!
That’s right. You can’t have a spotless home and a home full of children children and stay calm all the time and look like a model. You can’t work full time and be at home full time and be a social butterfly. It is give and take, but there’s a lot to give and a lot we can take.
Life is about prioritizing, respecting limits, setting boundaries, and of course growing.
Hashem tells us, “You can do this and this and this. You can have this and this and this.” And we translate it to, “I can’t do anything or have anything.”
Don’t tell yourself no when you can say yes or when you should say yes. Why? Because you’ll end up falling, feeling resentful, or angry.
A little bit goes a long way.
It’s not all or nothing.
May we allow ourselves to grow and expand by refraining from putting too many unnecessary limitations. May we respect what we can’t do and take joy in what we can. May we never allow ourselves to get frustrated or angry.
Shabbat shalom and Chodesh tov!
Many blessings in this new beginning.
Elana